Friends.

       I don't really know what is happening but my project group is in a mess right now. I wanna give up so badly. I just want someone to talk to and tell them how tired I am. To be honest whatever I do to help it is like U S E L E S S so what is the point of helping. We used to be best friends but now everything is falling apart. Sigh now I seriously don't know what to do to help the group. I feel like even if it is not my fault everyone will still hate on me and blame me. How I wish I have the ability to read someone's mind.

       I am the type of person that is straightforward and I always want to know the truth. For example, if you don't like me just tell me because I honestly hate to be in the dark and I will always feel hurt. I am actually guilty for ignoring people when I'm angry but I will still try my best to calm myself down to talk to that person. I don't really like to be ignored because it will make me look like a stupid.

       I have seniors telling me to not care when there are conflicts and let them settle themselves. I am trying and I don't wanna side anyone because I don't want to hurt anyone. Whenever there is a conflict, I think no one is totally right or wrong so I don't know how to help. I decided not to care but because they are my close friends, I would wanna at least be their listening ears.
        Jealousy. A feeling that no one likes to have it. Sometimes I just can't help myself feeling jealous. I'm probably replaced by someone. I am not like important to everyone anymore because they have their own life. I am actually kinda happy when I found someone feeling the same as me. At least I know that I am not overthinking because there are people agreeing with me.. I don't really wanna say too much because I don't want to break any of our friendship. It is okay. I have to accept the fact that I am probably an option in everyone's life. Whenever I try to care,I don't mind if no one appreciate it because I always believe they do appreciate it. No one is bad person. It's okay if I am an option to everyone but all I wanna say is that I know I did try to be a listening ear for everyone...

me...

         I shall stay happy and try to help as much as I can.. Sometimes over helping is only making the things worst.. so why not just shut up... I have to accept the fact that everything has change..

</3

follow me on Instagram @minnruuu 

follow me on Twiiter @xminrux

Ask.fm/loveebabyxx